Week 17: Home sweet home, I guess
How are you holding up?
I don't particularly like to stay home. I've been like that since I was a kid. My home (childhood and now) has always been my haven of peace. I like knowing that I have a space to call my own, where people love me and where I'm (relatively) safe. But I've always enjoyed galavanting the streets a bit more than spending time in my home. And I dont even ask for much! Spending the weekend at a friend's house. Going for ice cream. Chit chat while brunching.
Growing up in Haiti, I've spent my fair share of time at home. The streets weren't always peaceful. Between coup d'états and random armed groups taking over the streets, I've had to get used to staying home and entertaining myself. This, I think affected me in two ways. On one hand, I've learned the value of staying in to stay safe. On the other hand, I've learned to enjoy the littlest hint of peace and safety to the fullest.
As the region is slowly opening up, I'm slowly getting a bit more social. And this is making me anxious. While I'm glad to spend time with my friends, I am also fully aware of the increased level of risk. Plus, after spending weeks physically interacting with only 2 other humans, being in a room with 5 or 6 others is overwhelming.
Pre-COVID, I've had days where I chose to stay home and not socialize because my social calendar was a bit too full. What I'm feeling now is not the same. It's not a simple wish to sit this one out. It's actual exhaustion. Like, I get home and feel drained. Too much stimulation. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the interaction. It just tires me.
And some of my friends have noticed. At some point during the evening, I check out. I become quiet—I'm usually a chatterbox. So far, I've blamed it on being too busy at work. A white lie. No need to get folks on high alert.
Going back to "normal" isn't going to pan out the way I thought. This pandemic is changing me in ways I didn't think it would.
While I'm planning a couple of local trips, I'm doing so with safety in mind. We will exercise caution wherever we go.
I would be lying if I said I didn't miss travelling. I do. It's a huge part of the lifestyle I've built for myself. My definition of travelling has never been limited to international trips. The short getaways I'll be going on will definitely be satisfying. But I'm not really looking forward to hopping on a plane. (I'd love to apparate—that's a Harry Potter reference—in Grenada, or another Caribbean island.)
Until I go on another adventure, all I have are photos of trips past and YouTube travel videos.
Do you have any travel plans, local or international, this year? Do you have any travel-related fears?